Friday, January 9, 2009

What do You want to Have, Do, Be?

Maybe if I write this here, it will be real and I will have to scrupulously hold myself accountable to attaining these goals. That is what is missing from my new life: Goals. Of course I have everyday goals to keep my daughter fed, dressed, intellectually and emotionally stimulated, hugged and kissed and rolled around on the floor with, well rested and happy. And there are the daily domestic goals of keeping the floors clean, the wood stove burning, the refrigerator and cupboards stocked, the laundry at bay and the dusting, cleaning... and ("AND", not "but", I must remind myself, because I really wanted this and I chose it) those are the only real goals I have had for the past 14 months. I have spent a wee bit of time examining where I am, who I am and what I want to achieve. Not only as a mother, a wife and domestic goddess , but as a woman, a human, a wedding planner and a business owner. I am making goals for this year, not for the rest of my living days as I would have done in the past, but just for these next 12 months in front of me. That should be a good start. I am reminded of an invaluable lesson from one of my former mentors, Michael Shultz, who always asked me to ask myself, " What do you want to Have? What do you want to Do, Who do you want to Be?" whenever I went to him a bit stuck. Ahh, respect those who help you help yourself-he is still on my personal board of directors ten years later. One of the wisest and smartest (there is a difference) men I have ever met. Really- in the top five. Wise and smart way beyond his years. This brings me to a list I have made of what I want to do, what I want to have and who I want to be in the coming year. I am a bit scared to write this here, it seems quite personal, but part of this for me is to convince myself that we are all connected by similar threads and that being afraid of yourself or your goals or that others will judge you is for sissies. I do not want to be a sissie this year! In no particular order: Who I want to Be: Fearless Adventurous Compassionate Strategic Spontaneous Sassy Successful Confident Capable Tough minded Organized Determined Stylish Fulfilled Positive Passionate Fair Forward thinking Happy Curious Realistic Funny Patient Loving Ready Strong Myself What I want to Do: Open my heart and mind to possibility Stay connected: to people, the wedding industry, style & color trends Define what makes my business different, newsworthy Decide how to show others how my business is different, implement that plan Write a work schedule for each week, including planning time for the big picture Tour 15 venues I haven't worked with before Read, read, read: magazines, blogs, books, newspapers...Read to learn and stay connected Introduce myself to 50 new people Design and produce 3 fabrics Publish the book I wrote for Ava Finish a knit sweater (at this point I am shooting for just one!) Plan a trip to Bar Harbor Take Ava out into the world to see, hear, smell, taste, explore and learn about life Swim in Echo Lake with Chris and Ava Have a cup of tea during Ava's nap. Hot when it is cold, iced when it is hot Take a soaky bath once a month-to make the time for me to think and relax Be active-weekly exercise commitment Be true to what I believe and my values Rekindle my relationship with my husband-um we did hang out together a lot before we became parents and we kinda liked each other a lot-need to make time for us again! Complete the restoration of our vintage camper (Oops! Did I just spill the beans!?! I promise more on this later and a whole separate blog will be unveiled for the process to be shared!!) What I want to Have: A sense of Wonder A healthy child A happy child A happy husband A strong marriage A finished camper A tidy house An organized workspace Peace of Mind A positive impact on those around me A clean garage Faith in my abilities A financial plan Belief that all the wonders I seek are within myself A professional haircut ( I appreciate my husband's artistry with the scissors, but it has been almost 2 years-I need a professional!) A clear vision for the future of my business, without self imposed limits A closet filled with only clothes that I wear. Buh-Bye maternity and size 6 items! (See realistic, above) Hope for the future Guts This should be a good start. Now I will go about defining HOW I will ride out to meet these challenges. This next part may take me a bit of time-but now that I have the goals written, I should be able to make a plan and then just work the plan. Whew. I have some work to do!


Samantha Warren Weddings said...

I adore this post and it reflects an internal struggle I myself have been having. I think we believe (due to external pressures and of course, our own) that a real goal must really be a professional goal, and an impressive, often numbers-driven one at that! A goal must be tangible we imagine, because how else will we be able to prove we accomplished it. But I am slowly coming to see that perhaps there is no greater achievement than keeping the woodstove burning each day, and in your case, keeping Ava grounded in love and laughter. I love your wants list- and admire that really nothing on there is a thing. To achieving the abstract!!!

Anonymous said...

I hope more brownies for your neighbors is on the list too.

Meagan said...

Oh Yes and Brownies! This means we have almost known each other a year, doesn't it?!? Weren't brownines the first of many treats to be brought back and forth across the street? I will have to look up the original recipe, so as not to disappoint!